the unlikeable parts of self-care
When it comes to self-care people may think about treating themselves to a day at a spa, having some quality alone time, or spending some time on hobbies, but as I grew…
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pathological demand avoidance
I first came across this term when I was browsing the subreddits for adhd and autistic women. After reading more about it I realised belatedly (in my 40s) that I have been…
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I read last year’s post before writing this. Writing is a strange phenomenon. Though I am reading my own writing, it feels like I am reading the writing of another person. Perhaps…
ringfencing my self
I remember reading somewhere that just few decades ago we lived in small communities, unconnected by the internet. We would only need to cope with the happenings of this small community, and…
widening the spectrum of future possibilities
I used to really dislike washing dishes. I would leave them in the sink, and they would feel overwhelming when I finally had to do them at the end of the day….
the ability to see our selves as who we are
My tcm (traditional chinese medicine) appointment a couple of weeks ago was postponed because my physician was sick. I thought it would be fine to go a couple of weeks without, but…
living life like a solo rpg player
One of my all-time favourite games is stardew valley. I don’t actually play a lot of games, partially because they trigger migraines and motion sickness for me, and partially because a combination…
why I refuse to learn drawing properly
When some people want to learn to draw, they do it the “right” way. They take a drawing class, watch youtube videos, or buy a book – starting from the basics. I…
obsessively compulsively thinking about death, loss and existence
Some time ago while reading a blog post on autism I learnt about the concept of existential OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder): Existential OCD involves intrusive, repetitive thinking about questions which cannot possibly…
the answer I must seek
My partner pitter patters around the house constantly, always looking for something to do, always scheming up some new creative project of hers. Being with her is an ongoing lesson and reminder…