i think the fact that i even writing this post is funny. recent events have me thinking about mortality again, so i am going to try to overcome my weird shyness about the frequency of my posts.
i don’t really know what is the point of my life apart from staying alive for the people who care about me, and having contemplated seriously about whether i am autistic or not: my conclusion for now is that the only thing i feel remotely compelled to do is to document my thoughts and experiences. i realised i simply process the world differently, and a lot of it is done through the capturing of moments with the intention of documenting them, whether through text, art or photography. this is like my primary mode of existence in this world – i document, therefore i am – so i am going to fully embrace and express it.
instead of always feeling so hesitant because i feel so weird, i am just going to focus on being the fullest version of myself.
if you don’t want to receive the shorter-form more frequent notes in your rss feed – which may cover my instagram and mastodon posts as well – the rss feed to the longer-form posts is here.
this is the nth time i’m trying to do this, but i’ve never been really successful due to my inherent self-consciousness, so am just going to give it a good go again.