meeting people (and our selves) where they are
One of the hardest things to do in life is to meet people where they are. As I was typing this, I realised the concept of being at a place may be a little…
tags /empathy /
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on living in a world like this
The other week I read that Peter Thiel is leaving Facebook woops I mean Meta’s board, so he can reportedly “focus on supporting candidates running for office who align with the Trump…
The greater the congruence of experience
The greater the congruence of experience, awareness and communication on the part of one individual, the more the ensuing relationship will involve: a tendency toward reciprocal communication with a quality of increasing congruence; a tendency toward more mutually accurate understanding of the communications; improved psychological adjustment and functioning in both parties; mutual satisfaction in the relationship.
This risk of being changed is one of the most frightening prospects most of us can face
If you really understand another person in this way, if you are willing to enter his private world and see the way life appears to him, without any attempt to make evaluative judgments, you run the risk of being changed yourself. You might see it his way, you might find yourself influenced in your attitudes or your personality. This risk of being changed is one of the most frightening prospects most of us can face.
I am more willing to be myself
I am more willing to be myself, I find I am more ready to permit you to be yourself, with all that that implies.
he senses that he is psychologically received
I shall assume that the client experiences himself as being fully received. By this I mean that whatever his feelings—fear, despair, insecurity, anger, whatever his mode of expression—silence, gestures, tears, or words; whatever he finds himself being in this moment, he senses that he is psychologically received, just as he is, by the therapist. There is implied in this term the concept of being understood, empathically, and the concept of acceptance.
I become a companion to my client
Thus the relationship which I have found helpful is characterized by a sort of transparency on my part, in which my real feelings are evident; by an acceptance of this other person as a separate person with value in his own right; and by a deep empathic understanding which enables me to see his private world through his eyes. When these conditions are achieved, I become a companion to my client, accompanying him in the frightening search for himself, which he now feels free to undertake.