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2022: 自乐 (self-amusement)

I write one of these every year to pair with my year-end review. Part of me ponders again what is the point of setting intentions for the year when the marking of…

nostalgia, music, time and worth

Listening to music had always been a big part of my life. No, not classical music, but emo soppy mandarin/cantonese pop with some american/british pop (I was crazy over Take That) mixed…

This risk of being changed is one of the most frightening prospects most of us can face

If you really understand another person in this way, if you are willing to enter his private world and see the way life appears to him, without any attempt to make evaluative judgments, you run the risk of being changed yourself. You might see it his way, you might find yourself influenced in your attitudes or your personality. This risk of being changed is one of the most frightening prospects most of us can face.

the more I am simply willing to be myself

Yet the paradoxical aspect of my experience is that the more I am simply willing to be myself, in all this complexity of life and the more I am willing to understand and accept the realities in myself and in the other person, the more change seems to be stirred up. It is a very paradoxical thing—that to the degree that each one of us is willing to be himself, then he finds not only himself changing; but he finds that other people to whom he relates are also changing.

five stages of personal transformation

I feel like achieving new values / ways of life is like the five stages of grief. First there is denial: the denial of any need to change, then there is anger:…